Blog South Africa

A trial date has been set for 12 people accused of setting a pastor alight and murdering him. One of the accused is the induna of the community.

The group had claimed that Albert Malwane, a pastor of the Izwi Zion Christian Church in Boschfontein in South Africa had been using a magic invisible penis to sleep with women.

They also accused him of having the ability of talking to animals and accused his wife of being able to turn into a snail in order to terrorise the community.

Not only did the group, including the community headman, burn and kill the pastor, but they also burnt down his home in the Etitandini informal settlement.

His wife and daughter managed to escape and hide from the rabble.

The villagers then complained that Malwane’s family had used ‘muti’ to make them sick after Malwane’s death.

The 12 accused have not been asked to plead.

Tags: Crime, Society & Culture by James
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In the last few days we have heard reports on a mysterious shape-shifting monster which is stalking people in Steytlerville. Well it appears as though the monster has struck once again!

Another two sightings of the “shape-shifting creature” were reported on Sunday evening, said Warrant Officer Zandisile Nelani .

“Two men were walking near a tavern when they saw another man wearing a black jacket. One of the men, identified only as Nozipho, went up to the stranger and asked him, “What is your problem?” said Nelani.

When the stranger did not respond, Nozipho went closer and saw that the man had no head. The man then turned into a dog that was “very angry” and “as big as a cow”, Nelani said.

He said that as Nozipho and his friend ran away, the monster allegedly turned on another group of people in the same road. “They said it turned into a big monkey, and then it was gone,” Nelani said.

He said that since the monster was spotted near the tavern, people were afraid to go there at night.

Nelani said that the community had dubbed the monster “Bawokozi”, meaning ‘brother-in-law’.

Nelani said that a photograph had since been taken of the monster resting under a tree.

He said that when the photo was taken the monster had been in human form but when the photo was developed an unknown animal was visible in the picture.

“It is a very strange thing happening in Steytlerville, but no one has been hurt by it,” Nelani said.

Tags: Society & Culture, Weird & Unexplained by James
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In the heart of Africa, within the Kruger National Park in South Africa is a private game reserve called Timbavati.

Timbavati is the home of many of South Africa’s greatest animals, but it is most well known for a one of the rarest creatures of all – the white lion.

The folklore of the local Shangaan people have for hundreds of years spoken of how these creatures came to be.

Four hundred odd years ago there lived a mighty queen. Not only was she queen, but also a great spiritual person and the Rain Queen of her people. She was known as Queen Numbi, the ugly.

Although ugly in appearance, her people loved and respected her and when illness struck, feared for her life.

According to legend, Numbi’s legs and stomach swelled up and she was running a fever. Modern medicine tells us that this could have been a condition called ‘Elephantitis’ which could have been caused by Malaria.

As Queen Numbi got closer and closer to death, her people prayed to the ancestral spirits for help and healing. For months nothing happened and Queen Numbi got worse.

One day, when Queen Numbi was extremely close to death and her followers were at their wit’s end, night fell and the stars started appearing.

Suddenly one star grew bigger than the rest. As the people gazed upwards, the star got closer and closer. It is said that the animals in the bush started making a huge noise when the star got near.

People started shouting:

“Timbi le!”, “It has come down!”

“Timbi le vaa ti!”, “It has come down to the ground!”

Slowly the bright light floated down before touching down not far from the hut of the great Queen.

With her servants helping her, Queen Numbi was helped out of her hut and saw the bright light illuminating the whole area. She knew exactly what to do.
[Read more →]

Tags: Society & Culture by James
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Since the economic collapse in Iceland, the United Nations have decided that Iceland needs to move somewhere else in keeping in line with its now almost worthless economy.

The decision was made after Iceland’s President, Olafur Grimsson refused to sign a $5 billion (€3.64 billion) accord struck in December with the UK and the Netherlands to repay foreign depositor losses and said the bill must instead be put to a referendum.

Iceland has said that although the sun is much brighter and warmer, it is quite happy next to their new neighbours. However, it is a little worried about tropical storms which may damage it’s economy further.

“There is support for the view that the people should once again, as before, act together with the parliament as the legislator in this matter,” Mr Grimsson said “We will one day move up north again to regain our previous position in the world.”

South Africa’s President, Jacob Zuma told reporters at a press conference, “We welcome our new Nordic nation to Africa. In order to cement our relationship, I have asked President Grimsson to marry his daughter so I can take another wife. I have offered him lobola of 10 cows, 3 goats and 12 chickens. ”

Thanks to FAILBlog

Tags: Inspiration & Jokes by James
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South Africa rejoiced at the end of Apartheid when government censorship of the media was scrapped and the press was able to have the freedom which is necessary for a democracy. Now it seems as though this freedom is about to be taken away again – this time by the ‘freedom fighters’.

There are two prongs in the attack against the freedom of the press and our right to information.

The first attack comes in the form of ‘The Protection of Information Bill’ which is going before parliament soon. This bill would give the power to heads of government agencies to classify whole swathes of information on the grounds that it was in the “national interest”. This would then make disclosure of this related information a criminal offence punishable with up to 25 years in prison.

The second attack comes in the form of the proposed ‘Media Tribunal’ which would make South Africa’s press answerable to parliament. They would also have the power to censor anything they deem inappropriate.

The most worrying aspect of these attacks are their vague language which could incriminate anyone who challenges what the ANC deems to be bad. This is almost exactly what happened in the old Apartheid government with all its control and powers of censorship.

If this Bill passes and is enacted, we WILL see a time where any criticisms of the President or ANC leaders will be illegal, much like in other third world dictatorships around the world.

One has to wonder how this attack on the South African Constitution and Bill or Rights can be allowed. The Bill of Rights is clear on this:

16. Freedom of expression

The right in subsection (1) does not extend to
propaganda for war;
incitement of imminent violence; or
advocacy of hatred that is based on race, ethnicity, gender or religion, and that constitutes incitement to cause harm.
[Read more →]

Tags: Government & Politics, Society & Culture by James
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